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New Year, New...no...Real You

We all like “new.” New clothes. New restaurants. New adventures. Even a new car smell. It makes sense. The anticipation and excitement of something new releases dopamine, that pleasure-seeking hormone that keeps us hunting for more. Eventually, the “newness” wears off so now we need to find something “new” again.

Well, we do the same thing with ourselves. We don’t seem to ever be happy with the way we are. We don’t like the way we look, the way we feel, or the way we live our lives so, of course, we want to simply trade in our “old” selves for new ones.

Over the years, we spend so much time trying to create new versions of ourselves based on who we think we should be, what we think we should be doing, or how we think we should be living. Compared to everyone else, we believe we fall short. But guess what? The people we’re comparing ourselves to feel the same way!

You don’t need a new you. You need the real you.

We are all unique. We all have flaws. We all have strengths. So instead of trying to create someone new, get to know the real you. Put aside any expectations and assumptions and ask yourself:

  • Who am I?

  • What are my best qualities?

  • What matters to me?

  • What excites me?

  • What does happiness look like to me?

Embrace the real you.

I love Brené Brown’s description of authenticity:

“Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are. Choosing authenticity means cultivating the courage to be imperfect, to set boundaries, and to allow ourselves to be vulnerable; exercising the compassion that comes from knowing that we are all made of strength and struggle; and nurturing the connection and sense of belonging that can only happen when we believe that we are enough.”

Embracing the real you takes courage. It requires you to basically go against the norm of trying to be perfect and experience the freedom of knowing you’re enough exactly the way you are. It’s not a quick process. It means investing time and energy into learning your likes, wants, needs, values, priorities, and strengths. Over time, you’ll gain the ability to listen to and obey your intuition so you can remain true to yourself.

So, in 2023, don’t try to create another new you. Meet and embrace the REAL YOU.

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